
Ahh... The cultural experiences you can have in Lander, Wyoming... This morning I went on a city-wide haircut hunt only to be turned away by not one, not two, but three different establishments. Apparently Wednesday, May 5, 2010 is a hot date to have your ears lowered... The result of my early searches left me with one choice... City Barber Shop. I seem to remember being taken to the same shop when I was younger and I have to admit, it played a major role in my decision not to wait. Let me set the scene for you...
After a deep breath, you'll saunter your way up three steps and through the doorway. The barber, Larry, will pivot in his chair slowly to ensure you're actually one of the living, before springing to life like a rabid hyena. As you attempt to hang your coat on his coat rack he'll say, "not that one, that one" as points toward another rack on the far side of the room. Upon second glance, you'll notice the first rack is barely standing, completely broken, and should have been taken to the landfill months ago. Six months ago to be exact. "That rack's been sitting there for six months," Larry will comment.
As you sit down, he'll ask you... "Are you one of them noldies?" Your response, "yeah, yeah I am a NOLSie." And, just as you settle in... BAM! The clippers are on your head... Shaving away any chance of... "I'd like a little off the sides please."
Should you share that you're headed to Alaska he'll rant and rave about the "no-see-ums" and how much he "hates those little bastards" all while waving the clippers around erratically. Moving from side-to-side taking off uneven amounts, he'll avoid stepping over the clipper cord by instead spinning as if he's in a dance-off. As you accept your newly acquired high and tight you'll begin to take in your surroundings...
Listings for horses for sale. "Ooo... No papers for that Appaloosa," I say to myself. "Better avoid that one." Ahh... Civil War Times, the magazine... Classy.
Just as he's finishing up... One of his regulars will roll in. They'll exchange a salty round of banter in regards to "hey you old bastard, haven't seen you in three months." "Well, it is hair you're cutting, it has to grow you know." "Oh, another one of these guys! You see the sons of bitches I have to put up with?"
And, just as quickly as it began, you're done. He'll get out his brush to remove any excess hair, soon followed by a hand-held vacuum over every square-inch of your head. "How much do I owe you?" "Thirteen hard-earned ones." "Great! Here's a 20, give me a five back and we'll call it good." "Hey, thanks buddy, have a great time up there in Alaska."
And, as you saunter down those initial three steps... You'll think... Wow, that, world... was awesome!
View Larger MapCity Barber Shop, 147 North Main Street, Lander, WY (Small Building, Behind Light Post)
Oh, and did I mention... Larry closes down each fall with an 8.5x11 inch sheet of blank paper stating, "Gone Hunting. Will Return October 9th."
Riley says: "And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair."